How Not To Work and Claim Benefits...

Available now to buy/rent or to stream via Amazon Prime:

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Amazon Prime USA

Amazon Prime Germany

What's it About?

“How Not To Work” is a darkly boisterous psychological comedy drama about Mike and Dave; two boozy, unemployed degenerates living off the state, who find themselves dodging gangsters and on the run from the pigs.

Mike and Dave drink their lives away in a shitty flat, claiming their benefits by pretending to be mental. After a particularly boozy night, a mysterious stranger turns up at their door with ten thousand pounds and thanks them for agreeing to their “assignment” in the pub the night before.

They have no memory of this encounter, so they take his hard-earned cash and spend it on a lavish lifestyle. The creepy Mr Martin suddenly starts following them and they begin to suspect they’re at the centre of something very, very sinister.

When the police bash down their door and Mike is arrested on murder charges, it becomes apparent that they’re just bit-players in a much larger plot, and that they’ve become wrapped up in a lie that goes back a long, long time.


The film started out back in 2006 as a successful stage play called “A Story For When We’re Grandads”, touring theatres across the UK, picking up rave reviews, and a Best New Writing Award. Rewritten as a screenplay in 2011, the film went into production in August 2012 and was completed in 2016.


You can download Patrick’s original screenplay right here: “How Not To Work” Screenplay (Free Download)


Memorable Quotes:

Dave: F***ing hell, Tom, you’ve found the golden ticket. Why didn’t I know this before? I should be on the… incapable to work benefit thingy.

Tom: Incapacity benefit.

Dave: That’s the one!


Mike: Me and Dave are unemployed. We both choose to be unemployed. We just don’t like working.


Dave: You should get sympathy for hangovers. Other self-inflicted injuried and illnesses get sympathy. I mean, you don’t hear people saying “You know that Superman? That Christopher Reeves? I’ve no sympathy for him. I don’t care that he got crippled and died, he shouldn’t have got on the f***ing horse. Self inflicted. Tough shit.”


Social Media:

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